Does my bum look big in this??

I am searching, it seems my whole life for a denim space to call my own. It is the holy grail, not unique to me or other size 18 women, but synonomous I am sure, with simply being a woman. Yes - it truly is the final frontier - the search and discovery of the ultimate jean. What is the ultimate jean? It is a slab of denim that works with my body and makes me feel totally hot right now! It is denim that will mean I never have "nothing to wear". Easier said then done.

Enter the denim section of the plus size section - it starts well - the colour looks good, hmmm - even the finish could be cool, but as I edge closer my hope turns to despondency as I realize the elastic waist quarter has not been spared for the maternity section - there is it - waiting for me - a totally fashion forward size 18! And the high waist will vacuously envelope my whole stomach, prompting the "stupid ones" to ask when I am due. It's not that I usually look pregnant - but with a meter of denim firmly and snugly embracing my gut - I'm getting there. And just when I think it can't get any worse, I look down and am greeted by a tapered leg, and I'm not talking Nudie skinny jean cool tapered leg - nay - I am talking slightly baggy to the thigh and slimming down to less baggy but nonetheless shapeless tapered leg. I tell you - it bloody criminal - how hard is it to make a jean that works!!!!

I know what works because for years, probably like you, I have been trying and resisting what doesn't work. Hmmm - designer of fabulousness - note to self - no matter what - tapered jeans with a big paunch look BAAADD - and not in the cool rock chic baaadd way! The rules for a jean that works are simple and if you can find them, get them, and you will always get comments and feel like a million bucks.

FIRSTLY a nice wide waist band is imperative, so said denim minimises MUFFIN top. It will also give you proportion - thread a gorgeous wide belt through or dangle a knee length shimmy sash and you have just given your self total proportion - a gift!! The cut is the most important thing and no matter how much you hate your tummy, trust me - it won't disappear if you cover it in denim up to your rib cage - yes even if you wear a top over it. All it will do is make you look like your paunch has big length as well as girth and is covered in a layer of 13 oz denim - doing ourselves no favours there.

SECONDLY it is important to have jeans that will sit nicely on your bum. That means they need to fit well and have a nice ass cut into them - not a sloppy baggy bum. The jeans you are looking at above are on a true size 16 and you can see they SIT without giving a wedgie and they have cool pocket detailing. Any designer that pays attention to giving your bum shape needs a medal and whether it's Entitled, Jag or Sass and Bide - you need to buy a pair if they are paying attention to getting the ass right!

Next - a leg that is fitted to the thigh and then a gentle bootleg to give you perfect proportion. Skinny jeans are hot right now, but trust me, unless you are a size 2 - tread carefully! Nod to the trend by going for gently bootleg cut, but skinny all the way - it's very, very dangerous! This season the hottest look is dark washed denim and wear it with a shiny silk satin top and your favorite heels peeping out. Dark denim can take from casual to after five if you pay attention to detail and your accesories. I have promised that this blog is not about convincing you to buy more Entitled, but the J1 jeans work because they have had all the rules correctly applied to them. They are seriously hot jeans and if you want to look hot and have your ass looking as good as it ever has in denim, you need to get a pair of them or a pair which work to similar rules.

And the most important rule fashion warriors, even when defeat seems certain and failure impending, never, never give up the search, because when you find your holy grail - you will never be the same again!!!

Go forth and get good denim!!!!

Love always Your Designer of Fabulousness xx